delivered from the earthly

My last full post, preoccupation with spiritual life, ended on an incomplete note. It might have seemed that I err on the side of tossing values and standards to the wind, promoting a "do what you want" attitude as long as you believe in Jesus and love one another. That is not my purpose. Rather, I am working out flaws and errors in much of what has passed for Christianity today. I don't claim that I have arrived at all the correct answers. I am exploring, learning, asking questions, and testing the waters.

There is a prevalent attitude in Christian circles these days that is demanding and very expectation-based. Once someone claims Christ, there is this expectation that the person must now have it all together…or we who are “wiser” will tell them how to get it all together. Some are more reasonable than others and this looks very different depending what circles you wander in. If that person does not yet have it all together, then there is, at least a time-line that we have to put them on for when they need to get their act together. If they don't achieve that maturity within a certain timeline, that's when we attempt to lay down the law with them. This is the state when barriers start to go up. I've done it to others. People have done it to me. I have seen it done time and time again, to my friends, family, acquaintances. It's so exhausting. Encased within this mentality is expectation that they should conform to how we perceive the Christian life should look in its matured state, which involves a full-time abandonment of the flesh and earthly things. Christianity has become a special club to become delivered from all earthly things, including our own selves. Sadly, this takes the work of the Cross and, usually unintentionally, makes it insufficient. It can cover our justification, but it cannot secure our sanctification unless we do something. This is why Christians work so hard to look, act, talk and be godly. There are authors upon authors and preachers upon preachers who work so hard to help us get this sanctification thing right. However, most might disagree with me here. They might say that they 100% wholeheartedly believe that sanctification is God's work in us through the Holy Spirit. And they may very well believe it. I am not questioning that. I am questioning how they expect that to be lived out. To be honest, when you are involved in Christian circles that adopt this mindset of relating to other Christians, it is incredibly difficult, almost impossible, to see its errors. I speak from my own experience, but I have also seen this pattern repeated amongst various individuals that I know. In fact, I have seen this pattern emerging more and more in recent days. It has led to an enormous pool of hurt, jaded, bitter, and disillusioned Christians. It's easy to just let that be the final word and never work out the details, especially when one has been deeply wounded. I carry such wounds myself, many of them are from having to watch some dear loved ones walk a similar path. So, I make it my one aim to understand, to learn, to acquire the knowledge, but also the humility and grace to deal with such harsh realities within Christianity today. I want to be seen as approachable by brothers and sisters who may disagree with where I stand, but I also still harbor much fear in being rejected by those who I have called friends - individuals who, at one point, I was completely on the same page with them in regards to grace, the flesh vs the spirit, standards of Christian living, etc. The whole nine yards - I have been there. But now I am wrestling it out...what was it that actually got me there?

I'll just call it for what it is.

Christo-nazism. 

I know. That's harsh.

Dictionary.com describes nazism [lower-case] as a person who is fanatically dedicated to or seeks to control a specified activity, practice, etc. It's this deeply ingrained disdain for other forms of that practice. Perhaps you do not like to think of it as a form of nazism because, clearly, it doesn't take the form of  what we think of when we hear that word. I am not saying Christians are Nazis. Let's just make that clear. I am simply saying that the same heart-attitude that was present in the Germans (not only them, but all humanity) is the same attitude that Christians have adopted when we relate to non-Christians or Christians who don't look or live in a Christian way. In my understanding, this attitude seems to be the worldly mindset that Scriptures firmly tell us NOT to conform to. Unfortunately, it is so subtle and deceitful. In essence, it all comes down to control. Our nature thrives on control. Control of ourselves. Control of others. Control of God. Control is a fruit of fear, misplaced identity, and misplaced trust. I hope to write more about this in a future post because this is an incredibly dangerous and unhealthy way that we relate to our Christian brothers and sisters. It's a self-consuming engine in the long-run, but it often breeds disunity. Isn't it insanity that Christianity contains more denominations than any other known religion? I am fairly certain it's safe to assume that Catholics and Mormons are more united in their statements of faith than most Christians. I don't have the statistics to back that up, so please prove me wrong! However, having explored many "flavors" of Christianity (and I know I've barely touched the tip of the iceberg of Christian "flavors" in my personal experience, but just to be specific, I have been immersed in both Reformed and Charismatic circles and the many variations one finds within these two - sometimes, it has been a blending of both these theological camps), I have been introduced to the many varied and subtle walls and boundaries erected to "protect" and "sustain" their version of Christianity.


Recently, I came upon a very, very unexpected discovery.  Christoplatonism. Author and preacher, Randy Alcorn, coined the term in his book, Heaven. Now, some back story. The paragraphs in italics are Alcorn’s words.

In the writings of Greek philosopher Plato, we find that, for him, “the body is a hindrance, as it opposes and even imprisons the soul (Phaedo 65-68; 91-94).  Plato's statement, "soma sema" ("a body, a tomb"), he asserts that the spirit's highest destiny is to be forever free from the body.” This vein of thought stretched far as many of us are “familiar with Paul's defense of the physical resurrection to the Corinthians, who were immersed in the Greek philosophy of dualism. They'd been taught that the spiritual was incompatible with the physical.” 

“Platonic ideas began making inroads into Christian theology through the writings of Philo (ca 20 BC - ad 50). An Alexandria Jew, Philo admired Greek culture and was enamored with Plato's philosophy. He was also proud of his Jewish heritage. In his desire to offer the Greeks the best of Judaism and the Jews the best of Greek philosophy, he allegorized Scripture. Philo’s ideas caught on. Alexandria became the home of a new school of theological thought.”

In Appendix A of Alcorn’s book, Heaven, he continues with a history lesson on how Plato’s ideas caught fire and spread throughout the ages. If you are interested, I highly recommend you read it yourself, but I merely wanted to provide a summarize background for where and when Plato’s ideas began to merge with Christianity. Alcorn goes one to explain how their emphasis on the spiritual caused them to interpret the Scriptures through a lens of the physical descriptions and prophecies as only spiritual symbols. For example, John’s descriptions in Revelation of the streets paved in gold and gates of pearls, were to be interpreted that the heavenly city will not be material as present earthly cities. Those descriptions were taken merely symbols for the radiance and glory of the New Jerusalem, rather than the actual physical reality of what it will look like.

While Alcorn discusses Greek philosophies hijacking Christianity in regards to its understanding of heaven and its interpretations of Scripture, it is clear that this thinking has permeated Christianity in more areas than just the topic of heaven. The Gnostics and Medieval Christians were an extreme example of this unhealthy thinking, abstaining from sex, certain foods,  and all pleasures. Nevertheless, it continues on today, perhaps in more subtle and less obvious forms. It is most usually linked with pure intentions of desiring Christ alone, longing to see Him exalted and glorified in all actions, words, choices, and forms of art. While the desire to promote Christ in all things should be encouraged, the attitude that follows those noble intentions should be rebuked. This attitude, when left unchecked, begins to say “Do not handle. Do not taste. Do not touch.” In much of Christianity today, "Christoplatonism appears to take the spiritual high ground" and any "attempts to refute this false philosophy often appear to be materialistic, hedonistic, or worldly" (Alcorn).

A clear example of this that comes to my mind, is a well-known Christian female author and speaker  wrote a lengthy post about "dabbling in darkness." In one post she ruled out Twilight, X-Files, Buffy, Angel Charmed, Dracula, horoscopes, hypnosis, palm-reading, tarot cards, ouija boards, zodiac charms, fortune-telling, pagan paraphernalia (like Buddha statues), clothes or jewelry with skeletons, skulls, monsters, etc., and anything that promotes superstition, witchcraft, or séances.
Clearly, these things are not beneficial for us. Even if some of these things weren't associated with cult practices, we all can agree that buying a buddha statue and watching X-files isn't gonna enhance our life! Personally speaking, I am not into those things. However, while I can wholeheartedly agree with the Christian author that bringing certain things into our lives can interfere with our thought-life and we may put our minds on things that are not at all beneficial to us, I cannot agree with the concluding attitude that comes with this. I have personally witnessed it in my life, when I began going through a long list of ruling things out. And I have seen others, who are involved in ministry or merely serious about their relationship with Christ, take this same path. It begins with a well-intended firm stance that this thing (movie, object, etc) does not reflect Christ to us and should be thrown out. It starts with non-beneficial items and then it begins to move further out, crossing into every sphere of life. Everything gets thrown out or destroyed and, eventually, we lose our ability to objectively discern whether the thing, in and of itself, is truly damaging. Then, it infects the way we view others. We see a Christian friend with that object or thing and we begin to doubt their intentions and heart. We doubt their maturity. We lose respect in them. We begin to avoid them. We see them as foolish, immature, or not in Christ. We think that “thing” did it. It “led” them astray. Then, we begin to wonder if they are truly a follower of Christ because a believer only looks like A and could never look like B. We see them as unhealthy and “lesser than” and unable to “hear from God” as we do.

Do you see my point?

It is a downward spiral.

I do not believe there should ever be open discussion or teaching about the things we deem as evil or good and right or wrong unless we first are willing to approach it in a complete new way. We as Christians are always, always quick to make lists (whether those lists are right or wrong is not the point at the moment!) and quick to say “Do not handle. Do not taste. Do not touch.” before we ask God to grant us new eyes in order to see that thing and ourselves in a true context.

Alcohol, Harry Potter, Rated R films, genres of music (like metal or new age), Hollywood, even homosexual/transgendered people are all a handful of things we Christians avoid like the black plague. Then, we (very loudly) shout, “Don’t touch them!” As if we will become infected upon contact, as if it will drive God from our lives, as if it will block out the Holy Spirit’s voice and work in our lives.

I have reflected upon the interesting fact that whenever the Apostles, the Jews, or the Gentiles came to Jesus seeking clear, specific answers, He rarely ever gave it to them. His answers felt unhelpful and, at times, ambiguous. He was challenging them and He still challenges us in this way. We want to know specifics on how to live, what to eat, what to wear, what we should or shouldn’t say, what to listen to or not, etc. Something about our human nature wants to be told what to do. I am starting to think we would very much enjoy it if God just programmed us to be robots so things could carry on in a predictable fashion. We want organization, control, order, and clarity. God is not opposed to those things, but He is after our hearts. So, in a sense, He does make life “difficult” for us by not being specific. We, on the other hand, adore specifics. When He does not give it to us, we take matters into our own hands. While we are busy trying to make an organized religion, He sits by and watches and is patient. He knows we will see as He sees one day. We’re learning and stumbling. But He knows it will take a lifetime to get us to glory. We think we’ve got things right, but He always has a way of lovingly humbling us.

I sense this post is greatly unorganized and probably feels a bit ambiguous. Like I said before, I am still searching these things out and I don't want to say that I have arrived at the ultimate answers, but I do hope and believe that I am beginning to see more clearly. However, at this point in my life, I am unwilling to truly share my whole self with any Christian who wants to insist that everything be organized into little boxes of right and wrong, good and evil, non-Christian and Christian, God-glorifying and not-God-glorifying. I am sensitive to those kinds of Christians because I lived in such an extreme mindset of that for years and it stings me. But I have hope that I am coming closer (but have not yet arrived) to a place of being at peace with what I believe God has given for me to enjoy versus what he gives other Christians to enjoy. I am coming closer to a place (but have not yet arrived) of being at content with the diversity of Christianity and that my brothers and sisters don’t have to look like me, eat what I eat, enjoy what I enjoy, etc.

So, before I close this post, here are some fun facts about me that many Christian friends of mine don't know!

 I love listening to progressive metal non-Christian bands like Kamelot and Nightwish. Their sweeping epic and moving songs remind me of the stories that God weaves through the human race, both sad and lovely. In fact, while on this topic, I will just say 80% of the music I listen to is not of the Christian genre and the musicians/artists are not Christian and never speak of Christ. Yet, when I listen to the music, I hear God’s heart for humanity, the glorious color of people and their stories, their heartbreaks, their emotions, etc. The diversity of mankind does speak of God's work.

One of my favorite films is Gravity (made by non-Christians and complete with a few swear words, lol!) and it reminded me so much more than any film ever created by a Christian of how God brings life from death, loss, and pain. A non-Christian film stirred my thoughts to Christ more than a Christian film ever could. To me, Gravity was Christ-exalting even though the filmmakers are completely oblivious that they just spoke of Him (the creation cannot help but glorify the Creator because its using the very tools the Creator used to glorify Himself – i.e. the theme of life from death). Some of my other top favorite films include selections like Road to Perdition and Interstellar.

At one point in my life, I was a fan of literature like Dracula, Frankenstein, and the sci-fi books by H.G. Wells like The Island of Dr. Moreau and The Invisible Man. While I have (mostly) grown out of this fandom in terms of personal taste (I just like other different things more now), I still appreciate the other worlds and characters created by those author that remind me so much of the sad way that man degenerates when he denies his good Creator. It looks gruesome, but there’s no “pretty” way to portray man who looks for purpose and life outside of his Creator. For me, those books spark more in-depth conversation about God and man than all the safe, G-rated, “always-talking-about-Christ” Christian novels, which feel empty and artificial.

I like drinking wine because it is calming and a good digestive aid. I don’t feel the new to drink it in excess, but it’s kind of fun getting a bit tipsy (oops, did I just say that aloud?). Oh, I also enjoy a session of yoga here and there with essential oils, Native American flute music in the background, and deep rhythmic breathing. ;)

I think my point is clear. I enjoy things that, in some circles, are deemed as “un-Christ-like" and I do not in any way believe these things to be more of wrong, evil, sinful, right, godly, or good, etc. They are just things. He gives me the lens to see them in relation to Him.

I titled this post, “delivered from the earthly.” It’s meant to challenge you in what you have defined as “earthly.” For most of Christianity, they have allowed the unbiblical philosophies of Plato to define what is good and bad for Christians. Many of us continue to read Scriptures through this lens and this is my way of challenging you to find out if you are wearing a lens while reading Scripture, or in how you view Christians who don’t do life the way you do, or in what you are quick to judge as “only good” or “only evil.” This week, I am going to be reading through these passages from Mark 7 and Colossians 2 to allow my mind to be challenged. Notice how in Mark 7, after the discussion about what defiles a man, Jesus immediately departs to be with a Gentile woman (remember how lowly the Gentiles were in the eyes of the Jews - the Jews only saw them as not God's promised people and that no good could ever come from them or be for them). Also, notice in Colossians 2 that Paul begins with a lengthy description about our new identities before he discusses the judgements early Christians made on what not to handle, taste, and touch. The understanding of our new identities completely transforms the way we approach things.



Mark 7

Now when the Pharisees gathered to him, with some of the scribes who had come from Jerusalem, 2 they saw that some of his disciples ate with hands that were defiled, that is, unwashed. 3 (For the Pharisees and all the Jews do not eat unless they wash their hands properly, holding to the tradition of the elders, 4 and when they come from the marketplace, they do not eat unless they wash. And there are many other traditions that they observe, such as the washing of cups and pots and copper vessels and dining couches. 5 And the Pharisees and the scribes asked him, “Why do your disciples not walk according to the tradition of the elders, but eat with defiled hands?” 6 And he said to them, “Well did Isaiah prophesy of you hypocrites, as it is written,

“‘This people honors me with their lips,

but their heart is far from me;

7  in vain do they worship me,

teaching as doctrines the commandments of men.’

8 You leave the commandment of God and hold to the tradition of men.”

9 And he said to them, “You have a fine way of rejecting the commandment of God in order to establish your tradition! 10 For Moses said, ‘Honor your father and your mother’; and, ‘Whoever reviles father or mother must surely die.’ 11 But you say, ‘If a man tells his father or his mother, “Whatever you would have gained from me is Corban”’ (that is, given to God)—12 then you no longer permit him to do anything for his father or mother, 13 thus making void the word of God by your tradition that you have handed down. And many such things you do.”

And he called the people to him again and said to them, “Hear me, all of you, and understand: 15 There is nothing outside a person that by going into him can defile him, but the things that come out of a person are what defile him.” 17 And when he had entered the house and left the people, his disciples asked him about the parable. 18 And he said to them, “Then are you also without understanding? Do you not see that whatever goes into a person from outside cannot defile him, 19 since it enters not his heart but his stomach, and is expelled?” Thus he declared all foods clean.) 20 And he said, “What comes out of a person is what defiles him. 21 For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, 22 coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. 23 All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person.”

And from there he arose and went away to the region of Tyre and Sidon. And he entered a house and did not want anyone to know, yet he could not be hidden. 25 But immediately a woman whose little daughter had an unclean spirit heard of him and came and fell down at his feet. 26 Now the woman was a Gentile, a Syrophoenician by birth. And she begged him to cast the demon out of her daughter. 27 And he said to her, “Let the children be fed first, for it is not right to take the children's bread and throw it to the dogs.” 28 But she answered him, “Yes, Lord; yet even the dogs under the table eat the children's crumbs.” 29 And he said to her, “For this statement you may go your way; the demon has left your daughter.” 30 And she went home and found the child lying in bed and the demon gone.

Colossians 2

Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, 7 rooted and built up in him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving.

8 See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ. 9 For in him the whole fullness of deity dwells bodily, 10 and you have been filled in him, who is the head of all rule and authority. 11 In him also you were circumcised with a circumcision made without hands, by putting off the body of the flesh, by the circumcision of Christ, 12 having been buried with him in baptism, in which you were also raised with him through faith in the powerful working of God, who raised him from the dead. 13And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, 14 by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross. 15 He disarmed the rulers and authorities and put them to open shame, by triumphing over them in him.

16 Therefore let no one pass judgment on you in questions of food and drink, or with regard to a festival or a new moon or a Sabbath. 17 These are a shadow of the things to come, but the substance belongs to Christ. 18 Let no one disqualify you, insisting on asceticism and worship of angels, going on in detail about visions, puffed up without reason by his sensuous mind, 19 and not holding fast to the Head, from whom the whole body, nourished and knit together through its joints and ligaments, grows with a growth that is from God.

20 If with Christ you died to the elemental spirits of the world, why, as if you were still alive in the world, do you submit to regulations—21 “Do not handle, Do not taste, Do not touch” 22 referring to things that all perish as they are used)—according to human precepts and teachings? 23 These have indeed an appearance of wisdom in promoting self-made religion and asceticism and severity to the body, but they are of no value in stopping the indulgence of the flesh.

prayer minstrel: Michael Card

 I am going to be straight-up honest: I don't have much inspiration for blogging or any form of social media lately. I am in an indescribable season of emptiness at the moment. So, I lack quite a bit of motivation. However, I wanted to share another prayer minstrel post for my series and this one is another special artist close to my heart because I grew up listening to his music: Michael Card. I cannot remember a time in my life where his music wasn't present. Most would recognize him as being a well-known name during the late 1980s and early 90's. El Shaddai, Love Crucified Arose, God Will Provide a Lamb are just a few of his originals that are most familiar. His discography spans over 25 albums, most of which are all original songs. Not being a fan of the vast majority of Christian music from the 80s and 90s, I firmly believe that Michael was ahead of his time. He never allowed his songwriting to be boxed in by the industry standards (or lack thereof, ha!). Upon listening to his album, although some of the instrumentation or arrangements might sound "dated" and "old", one can immediately sense the deep connection between Michael Card and his creations. Each song is special and stands out as a unique masterpiece. 

Honestly, it has been many years since I have sat down and listened to an entire album by Card. Time has flown by, but I have always remembered his tunes fondly. Each and every song by him made up my child. His tunes painted my days with colors and, I believe, nurtured my tender faith in Christ at a very young age. When I listen to his music, images and memories come to mind of every home I lived in from ages 4 through 14. I remember moments in solitude, with family, vacations, and daily activities that were accompanied by his albums. While my parents introduce me to Christ early on, I believe the music of Michael Card nurtured a deep love for the Lord and His Word in me. When I think on this, I am truly grateful that my parents brought his music into our home. His thought-provoking, Scripture-filled lyrics encouraged me to dwell upon spirituality and life in Christ at a very early age. I have no doubt the Spirit was at work in little-Erika through Card's songs. Recently, I have begun listening to his songs again. Why? Life has become hard. My parents' divorced last year and I've wanted to hold the pieces of my childhood again. If you have read any of my previous posts, I think I've stated how it has felt that I have lost a certain aspect of my childhood with the recent divorce of my parents. Yes, I have been an adult for quite some years now, but the foundation that was laid has been shaken and the innocence that I once knew as my family history has now been lost. So, I am looking back into the past, trying to find traces of the Lord's hand in the history of my life with my family that manifest His faithfulness to us even when sin abounded underneath the surface. Listening to Michael Card this entire past month has been a confirmation to me of God's work in my imperfect family and my imperfect life.

Again, as with most of my prayer minstrel posts, I feel at a lost for words in describing this music that has played such a significant role in my life. Michael Card's songs are a sweeping epic! He is a storyteller, a preacher, an artist, and a counselor through all that he composes. His Ancient Faith 2-disc album is literally a soundtrack of the Old Testament. I've yet to see anyone arrange a collection so skillfully. His album, The Unveiled Hope, arranges a score for the book of Revelation that captures the terrifying, buy redemptive nature of that time to come. The Life albums encompass the life of Jesus Christ. The Promises celebrates the birth of Christ. Present in Reality puts words to this journey of the Christian life. He utilized choral and orchestral arrangements quite often throughout his albums, which added to the epic nature of his songs. The fact that he covers nearly every well-known Biblical story or topic on the Christian life is impressive! I feel that he could deliver a thorough presentation of the Gospel through song to anyone who has not known Christ or anyone who hasn't understood the basis for the Christian Faith/Life. And I believe any true musician and songwriter would appreciate Card's mastery of song. Whether or not you are drawn to this particular style or subject of music, his ability to weave meaningful stories and human and heavenly themes into thickly layered and rich melodies and instrumental arrangements can be admired by everyone. His songs age very well, I think, and will live long for decades to come. In fact, his "art" of music reminds me very much of Bunyan's book, Pilgrim's Progress. Pilgrim's Progress, like many Christian allegories, lives well beyond past its time because it speak of themes so near to us who are merely pilgrims passing through this world. If Pilgrim's Progress is still alive 300 years after it was published, I predict that the songs of Michael Card will see such future days!

I am drawn to the good-natured, friendly, and humble personality of Card. While I've never had the opportunity to see him perform life, I have watched videos of him preaching and I have been struck by his down-to-earth nature. He has a humor that I "get" and he seems so approachable and understanding. I love getting to see bits of the "person" behind the masterpiece. It makes me appreciate their work all the more! The songs I have listed below by him are merely the tip of the iceberg of his incredible and timeless work. These particular selections have been speaking life into me lately so that is why I chose these 8 songs for this post. May any listeners who come across this page be blessed and comforted by these selections!

I will Bring You Home
Though you are homeless
Though you're alone
I will be your home
Whatever's the matter
Whatever's been done
I will be your home
I will be your home
I will be your home
In this fearful fallen place
I will be your home
When time reaches fullness
When I move my hand
I will bring you home
Home to your own place
In a beautiful land
I will bring you home
I will bring you home
I will bring you home
From this fearful fallen place
I will bring you home
I will bring you home

Job Suite
(lyrics on video)

Song of Gomer
 Don't know what he sees in me
He is spirit, he is free
And I the wife of adultery
Gomer is my name
Simply more than I can see
How he keeps on forgiving me
How he keeps his sanity
Hosea, you're a fool
A fool to love someone like me
A fool to suffer silently
Though sometimes through your eyes I see
I'd rather be a fool
The fondness of a father
The passion of a child
The tenderness of a loving friend
An understanding smile
All of this and so much more
You've lavished on a faithless whore
I've never known love like this before
Hosea, you're a fool
A fool to love someone like me
A fool to suffer silently
Though sometimes through your eyes I see
I'd rather be a fool
This God of yours would not have told
To lift a love that you couldn't hold
And though time and time again I flee
I'm always glad to see you coming after me
Simply more than I can see
How he keeps on forgiving me
The wife of adultery
Gomer is my name

Why

Why did it have to be a friend
Who chose to betray the Lord
Why did he use a kiss to show them
That's not what a kiss is for

Only a friend can betray a friend
A stranger has nothing to gain
And only a friend comes close enough
To ever cause so much pain

And why did there have to be thorny
Crown pressed upon His head
It should have been the royal one
Made of jewels and gold instead

It had to be a crown of thorns
Because in this life that we live
For all who seek to love
A thorn is all the world has to give

And why did it have to be
A heavy cross He was made to bare
And why did they nail His feet and hands
His love would have held Him there

It was a cross for on a cross
A thief was supposed to pay
And Jesus had come into the world
To steal every heart away

Yes, Jesus had come into the world
To steal every heart away

Immanuel

A sign shall be given a virgin will conceive
A human baby bearing undiminished deity
The glory of the nations a light for all to see
That hope for all who will embrace His warm reality

Immanuel our God is with us
And if God is with us who could stand against us
Our God is with us
Immanuel

For all those who live in the shadow of death
A glorious light has dawned
For all those who stumble in the darkness
Behold your light has come

Immanuel our God is with us
And if God is with us who could stand against us
Our God is with us
Immanuel

So what will be Your answer? Will You hear the call?
Of Him who did not spare His son but gave Him for us all
On earth there is no power there is no depth or height
That could ever separate us from the love of God in Christ

Immanuel our God is with us
And if God is with us who could stand against us
Our God is with us
Immanuel

Immanuel our God is with us
And if God is with us who could stand against us
Our God is with us
Immanuel

Then They Will Know
 I will speak
I will wait
I will send prophets among them
That they might hear
That they might see
And understand how much I love
them
Then they will know that I am Father
They they will know I am Lord
They'll walk with Me
And be My people
I'll walk with them as their God
as their God
I will strike
I will scourge
And carry out vengeance upon them
But I will heal the woun
ds I make
And tenderly take them back to me
Then they will know that I am Father
They they will know I am Lord
They'll walk with Me
And be My people
I'll walk with them as their God
This is heaven
This is salvation
This is their great hope and M
ine
He will come
My own Son
A Word faithful hearts can't help hearing
And by His death
With His last breath
A Father's forgiveness comes flowing
Then they will know
That I am Savior
I am Redeemer and Friend
Immanuel
The God who is with them
The God who gives all He can
He is salvation
He is the kingdom
To know Him is paradise
Then they will know that I am Father
They they will know I am Lord
I am Lord

Stillness and Simplicity
(lyrics during video)

The New Jerusalem

I saw the Holy City 
Descending from the sky 
So brilliant with the light of God 
The city is His bride 
There is no temple in this town 
No sun, no moon, no lamp 
For God's own glory is it's light 
Illuminated by the Lamb 
And God Himself will wipe the tears 
From every weeping eye 
No death, no pain, no mourning cry 
And every tear made dry 

And now our God will dwell with them 
The new Jerusalem 
And He Himself will walk with them 
The new Jerusalem 

And so let all of those who thirst 
Come now and drink for free 
And to the one who overcomes 
Come now and you will see 
Behold the old has passed away 
Now everything is new 
The Alpha and Omega's words 
Are trustworthy and so true 
And God Himself will wipe the tears 
From every weeping eye 
No death, no pain, no mourning cry 
And every tear made dry

redefining perfection

Shortly after last week's post, I came across this gem of a quotation. It so accurately summarized the aim of my recent posts on grace and surrendering spiritual perfection to the Lord.

The tension of living in the aim while feeling like you continually come up short creates humility which is God’s aim in the first place. Even through our “failure” we are often hitting the true target. I have found in my life failure has produced as much fruit as devotion when I don’t yield to condemnation but rather throw myself at His kindness and strength. The Potter is aiming at humility, gratitude and meekness. His goal is not perfection in the way we define it, but perfection in Love and the one who is forgiven much, loves much. It’s all working for me, if I keep running to Him, never give up the aim and don’t get caught up in measuring myself. I don’t want to be preoccupied with my success or my failure, cause only He can see the true target and His hands are working good in me, if I just don’t give up, hit delete on the good and the bad and keep aiming.

~ Misty Edwards

preoccupation with spiritual life

Last month, I shared some personal words on my post, In the Lack of Response and Receptivity. This post is a continuation of that same thread of thought. Let me share a story that has proven to be my healing and yours as well. A story that has proven to be our redemption, our hope, our life!

In the book of Genesis, we briefly catch a glimpse of an Egyptian female servant name Hagar. She is the servant of Sarah, wife of Abraham. For years, Hagar's mistress is infertile. She must have seen her lady eaten up with some anxiety and sadness over this barrenness, especially after the Lord promised them a child who would bring a multitude of generations. In effort to obtain that promise, Sarah gives Hagar to Abraham to sleep with and produce a child. This did not go as Sarah had planned. Hagar looks upon her with contempt after this and Sarah is offended by her servant's attitude and behavior. This results in Sarah dealing harshly with her which forces Hagar to immediately flee.

Stop for a moment and think on this. We are familiar in how this passage of Scripture is taught today. Obviously, it was an act of the flesh and produced nothing good. Hagar and her soon-to-be-child represent the fruit of the flesh. It is the lineage of slavery, not of life or freedom. True.
 This vein of teaching on the flesh continues further today, sometimes so subtle and almost unnoticeable that we do not realize the conclusions it is pushing us to. If the flesh equals nothing but slavery and death, therefore we must "do away with it." Therefore, we must stomp out everything that comes from the flesh, in our lives, in others' lives, in media, in music, in the world, in everything. We must call it out. We must proclaim it for what it is. We must not allow it any part of Christianity. It must not taint. There must be a security system set up within our lives and our churches to ensure that it does not spread and taint the purity of the free life of the promise that we have in Christ. We must manage, we must control...our own lives, our family, the lives of those around. Set up the sin-management security system, folks, because we must protect the sacred church!

While there is much to be said for upholding Truth and values, the attitude and methods we've adopted to enforce them have all come from one source: fear. I can't say (even for myself) that I meet many Christians who just simply trust God with the messiness of His own children.

Now, let us return to the story. Something very sweet is about to take place here...

"The angel of the Lord found her by a spring of water in the wilderness, the spring on the way to Shur." Genesis 16:7

The Lord found her. Oh, He found her! The Lord gives her something special in this moment. He promises her a son whose offspring He will multiple. Even though her son will become a man whose hand is against everyone, and everyone's hand against him, his name will be Ishmael, which means "God will hear."

"So she called the name of the Lord who spoke to her, “You are a God of seeing," for she said, “Truly here I have seen him who looks after me.” Therefore the well was called Beer-lahai-roi (the well of the Living One who sees me); it lies between Kadesh and Bered." Genesis 16:13-14

The story continues in Genesis Chapter 21 soon after the birth of Isaac, the true son of Sarah and Abraham. We are not given many details, but Sarah catches Ishmael laughing. Was he laughing at Sarah and Isaac? Was he mocking them? I get the feeling that Ishmael may not have been the sweetest boy. He might have lacked respect towards Sarah due to the upbringing of his own mother, Hagar. Nevertheless, God allows (again) for Hagar to be driven out after Sarah demands Abraham,
“Cast out this slave woman with her son, for the son of this slave woman shall not be heir with my son Isaac.” 

This section stood out to me in a way I never realized before. It sounds like Christianity's moral police. Sarah would have been immensely humbled if she had been given a peek into the future and how both their lineages would share in the same Promise, only it would come about very differently than anyone could have ever imagined.

Before Abraham casts them out, God actually talks to him and says not to be displeased with Hagar and Ishmael. Abraham then sends them off into the wilderness with food and water.  At some point during their wandering, Hagar runs out of water and food for her and Ishmael. Life has become extremely bitter for them. She truly believes she must watch her son die. So, she walks a distance away from him and weeps. Then, something amazing happens! It says, "God heard the voice of the boy..." (Gen 21:17). 

Was Ishmael praying and calling upon God? Had this boy's heart softened in the affliction? I wonder how old he was, how much he was able to comprehend from the struggles between his mother and Sarah, and did he understand why they were sent off to the desert? Had he grown up hearing about God from Abraham? What did Ishmael know of God? Clearly, it was enough to lead him to say something to the Lord. Then, it's as if the heavens open...

 "...the angel of God called to Hagar from heaven and said to her, “What troubles you, Hagar? Fear not, for God has heard the voice of the boy where he is. Up! Lift up the boy, and hold him fast with your hand, for I will make him into a great nation.” Then God opened her eyes, and she saw a well of water. And she went and filled the skin with water and gave the boy a drink.  And God was with the boy, and he grew up. He lived in the wilderness and became an expert with the bow."
Genesis 21:17-20

In both chapters, there is a well or spring of water. The second time, God actually opens Hagar's eyes to see the well. The word used for "opened" in this passage is the same word used in Isaiah 42:6-7 in a prophetic word about Christ coming to be a light for the Gentle and open the blind eyes. Also, the use of a well or spring of water is often used through Scripture, particularly in Isaiah, as a symbol of life and rebirth in the Savior to come. And it is almost always in the context of a wilderness.  

 

Hagar. An instrument of the flesh. 
Ishmael. A product of the flesh. 
Yet, through Abraham' and Sarah's child and lineage, a great favor was extended to Hagar and Ishmael. The Lord set upon them and their lineage - heathens, idolaters, Gentiles - a promise that He would see and He would hear them. The Lord was going before them. He would make a way.

That is Grace. Amazing Grace. The Lord says, I will make a way. I will provide a way to put my favor upon you.  

 Grace. So gentle. So ridiculous. So unrelentingly good.
Every day available. Every moment, free. All because of Christ. All because of this untouchable God that, since day one of humanity's existence, wanted us to touch Him and be the very part of Him. He would have it no other way. 

I once thought that there was such a thing called cheap grace. Yeah, you know...the "license to sin under the banner of Jesus." The freedom to follow the flesh and do whatever I want while still claiming Christ. 

One day, I got hit on the head extremely hard. 

The Bible never once teaches cheap grace? 
What?!

I followed the jargon, the Christian lingo, the ideas produced from pulpits and thought it was fully outlined in Scripture. Then, during a tumultuous season of my life, I was awakened to the deep, interconnected relationship between Grace and Identity and Receiving IN Christ. If separated from these, Grace becomes merely a nice idea, but easily redefined by Christendom. Grace is never, ever separate from Identity. In fact, Scripture never separates unconditional favor and who we are in Christ. The two play hand-in-hand. Most often, when we say a Christian is willfully sinning, we might say they believe in cheap grace, which is really just a shallow phrase for what we see happening on the surface level of that person's life, their choices, their actions, their behaviors, etc. It's easy to think, "Oh, they are taking advantage of the free ticket just so they can do whatever they want." In truth, what is occurring beneath the surface is an enormous identity crisis. Perhaps that person is trying to run from this inner-confusion unscathed and still be thought of as favored and loved. We have all done it in varying degrees. Such is our human nature. And we often misplace our identities, yes, especially us Christians.
 It's what I had realized that I have done over and over again. My identity became holy perfectionism, the call of the upright, the victorious Christian life, the gentle and meek and selfless heart, the ever-deepening and intense relationship with Christ. Rather, my identity really only comes from Christ Himself. 

But, one might say, isn't holiness, selflessness, a deepening relationship with Christ, etc all part of taking upon His identity? Yes, I would agree. But it is not those things, in of themselves, that makes us who we are. Because when those things aren't visible in my daily life, I need something absolutely real and solid to fall back upon. When I'm shattered by life experiences and feel myself changing with the ebb and flow of this earthly existence, I need something, someone, who is unchangeable. Christ. And I need Him to be the One to define who I am in those moments when I cannot recognize myself, to remind me of who I truly am in Him, because of Him.

Can I accept that I don't have to pray at certain times for certain lengths to achieve more holiness?
Can I accept that I don't have to read the Bible at appointed times and lengths to achieve more holiness?
Can I accept that I don't have to go to church, manage my own sin, think continually on spiritual thing, do the right "Christian" acts to receive a special, more intimate favor from the Lord?
Can I accept that I don't have to toss out that immodest piece of clothing, that rated-R film, those CDs that speak nothing about Christ to remove the "fleshly hindrances" that keep me from "going deeper with Christ"? 
Can I accept, now that I am in Christ and He in me, that I don't have to do more, be more, and say more to grow in holiness? 
Can I accept that increased devotion and diligence will not make me feel close to God again?
Can I accept that I don't have to keep flagellating my own heart for those mess-ups I did the other day? 
Can I accept that I don't have to put myself on an orderly and strict daily schedule to keep my flesh and sinful tendencies in line?
 Can I accept that I don't have to work for my sanctification and make it "happen" because God wants to do it all His way and in His time?
 Can I accept that I am just a child and that maturity is not the "next level up" but rather an attitude of the heart in receiving what He wants to share with me right here, right now and depending entirely on Him (and not my spiritual unction) to produce fruit in my life, to grow me, and get me where I need to be on His time?
Can I accept slow progress? Can I accept slow growth in myself and others? 
Can I accept that Love is truly patient? 
Can I accept that God doesn't put me on a time-table? 
Can I accept that He doesn't need me to do anything to get me perfected in His love?
Can I accept that real life is not always going to be victorious?
Can I accept that sometimes sin abounds so that His grace can abound all the more?
Can I accept that I won't always experience peace, joy, and some nirvana spiritual/emotional state through every trial? 
Can I accept that the all-encompassing truth of His never-ever changing affection for me is enough when the rubber meets the road?
Can I accept that I am born-again child of God still stuck in a human shell and never will be some superhuman on this earth? 
Can I accept that the motivation of grace will always bear greater fruit than the coercion of demand? Can I accept that He values me, all of me, because He made me?  
Can I accept that instead of trying so hard to become godly, I can just trust that I already am?
Can I accept that I am free from lists, rules, and demands?
Can I accept that who I am as a Christian and who I really am have become the same person?
Can I accept that God is not afraid to risk the consequences of what we do with His grace? 
Can I accept that God is infinitely less interested in my vision of holy, Christ-centered perfection than He is with my person?
Can I accept that God is totally patient with my self-centered habits and thoughts and motives? That He knows it will take time, experiences, failures, and joys for me to realize I don't have to hold onto them since those aren't who I am in Him?
Can I accept that fragile but authentic trust is more enjoyable to God than strong inborn capacity?
Can I accept that on my worst day, Christ is in me, loving me, treasuring me, adoring me, pursuing me?

It's scary, I know. To relinquish all forms of control in my own sanctification, my own growth, my own maturity, my own relationship with God. I know very well the thoughts that unravel from this:

"So you're just saying to give into the flesh? To do what you want? To forget Scripture, prayer, church, etc? To watch any film you want to watch? To wear anything you want? To speak however you desire? To listen to whatever music you want? To just go on living as if Christianity is not life-changing and doesn't set us apart from non-Christians?" 

 I have questioned myself with these time and again. But Christ never said that the world would know us by how much we pray, or read Scripture, by what films we watch or don't watch, what clothing we wear or don't wear, what church we attend, what words we speak or don't speak, etc. He said they would know us by our love for the other. So, I conclude that, even when we mess up, even when we don't speak the right words, even when we don't go to church, even when we don't look, act, or live a certain way, there has to be one thing that remains consistent about us: Love. It's got to be the one thing that remains, day in and day out. It's got to change the way we view God, the way we view ourselves, the way we view others - and others will see that and it will baffle them! If Christ had meant for there to be a certain lifestyle or culture about us, He would have said so and clearly outlined it. Instead, He desires us to learn along the way, not to get it right all at once. The Holy Spirit is the One too speak, guide, and confirm in us and, yet, it takes time for us to become attentive and dependent on that Voice. More and more, I have become aware of how much being a Christian is like starting out as an infant and growing through many long years of childhood as He does His work of maturing us. While children inherit the physical qualities of their parents, much of childhood and even in the early years of adulthood, the child may not reflect at all everything their parents instilled in them. For some individuals, it does takes years and years of patience. It is very much the same with us. We can hammer ourselves and others all day long about being childish and needing to grow up, but none of that will ever produce true maturity. It may takes years of Christ patiently touching and whispering to our hearts for us to finally become open to receiving what He has been saying to us the entire time. Just like a child who may have grown up being taught principles and values, etiquette, how to do this/that, and even hearing his parents tell him how much they love and adore him. It might not come until a later point in that child's life when he awakens to experience those truths and decide to receive them as his own.

So, how shall we live?

Questions on the practical aspect are always good questions, but not always necessary. The answers come slowly as one opens to receive and experience grace and identity through Christ. It's not a straight-line to glory. We find those answers along the way, not always all at once. Yes, the Scriptures has some specifics. The purpose of this post is not to debate or discuss those specifics. That's for another day. I write all this merely to express and outline my personal revelations, growth, questions, and thoughts concerning the fundamentals of the Christian faith. There is so much noise in modern Christianity today, from every angle, from every denomination, theological circle, pastor, blogger, worship leader, etc. So much noise and not enough quiet honesty.In fact, authentic honesty is what is missing from much of Christianity today. We are still human, my friends.

Preoccupation with the spiritual life is often one of the most dangerous forms of a misplaced identity. I know it because I've suffered from it. And I am still recovering.